By Julien Munoz
It was more than twenty-five years ago, once the thankless age had come. However, Coralie thinks about it regularly when she comes across one of those who were his “executioners” as a teenagerto the out of school of the children.
When I see her, my heart aches every time. I find myself weak like when I was 11 years old. I have only one fear now: that my children are going through the same thing.
For a long time, Coralie didn’t dare talk about it. One evening, when she returned home, his parents fell from above.
Build in adversity
Her glasses were broken, she had a black eye. For several years, a girl from her village and a few of her friends loved to insult him, usually in a group. In the courtyard of middle School, they had fun lifting her skirt for everyone to laugh at, and then threatening to divulge certain things. In the school bus, Coralie regularly took slaps. These blows, these humiliations, the adult she is today has not forgotten them.
the school harassment affects approximately 10% of students each year. A wound that leaves scars. These repeated behaviors cause great suffering to the victims and sometimes have an impact on their school results, at a time in life when identities are forged. And the differences become a reason for exclusion.
I was overweight and other students laughed at me and pushed me on the lockers. I had a depression for several weeks, I was crying. It was very hard. I took refuge in the infirmary during sports hours so as not to be in the locker room with the other students. My parents helped me change my diet. I lost my few extra pounds and grew at the same time. I suffered for almost three years. Then, I never again let the bad jokes inappropriate against me, but also those suffered by other students.
College painkiller, forever
Some find it hard to trust, others doubt their own qualities, are prone to social anxiety. The fear of being ridiculed in public is never far away, asserting oneself in a conflict remains difficult… When self-esteem is fragile, the repercussions can be felt in their love, social and professional life.
Several years after college, Chloe needed to be closer to a hypnotherapist to help him evacuate his anxieties. For a time, as an adult, she was afraid that the traumas would resurface and that it would start again, at work. In college, the young girl was not well in her skin. Not very feminine, braces, a square cut, cheeks a little more pronounced than she would have liked…
5% to 6% of French pupils are victims of school harassment in France. Figures disputed by the associations which evoke, they, 10% of harassed pupils. In relation to the number of school children, this represents 1 million victims.
“A girl I was with in primary turned people against me, so little by little it was a shame to be with me, says Chloé. I isolated myself and was the whipping boy of college. On the bus, no one left me a place to sit. I had been given a nickname due to my physique. I was often alone to eat. I remember a guy stuck a compass in my back when he was behind me in class. Today, I manage to feel strong to have survived all that. »
Against bullying, a daily fight
A few years ago, Zoé (first name changed) wanted to take the plunge from the terrace of a Cherbourg apartment. In high school, at the age of the first great love affairs, Zoé had shown a friend a video that should have remained only for her. For fun, his girlfriend circulated the video on Snapchat. A few people at the school saw her.
Others didn’t, but claimed the opposite by greatly amplifying the reality of things. Rumors circulated, on social networks and in the hallways. When she found out, Zoé thought her life was over. Death did not want her. Since then, she has rebuilt herself far from here and found happiness.
To make the educational community aware of the phenomena of bullying in the school environment, the National No to Harassment Day is organized every first Thursday of November.
A moment to highlight the prevention of this violence often psychologicalsometimes physical which enter the daily life of young people who are not necessarily equipped to deal with it. Playground, toilets, lunch break… School bullying is rampant in blind spots.
College, a pivotal moment
A recent study by the IFOP explains that this violence takes place mainly in middle school (54%) but it also takes place in primary (23%) and high school (13%).
Prevent and cure
Most of the time, it reinforces isolation of the child, for whom it is difficult to talk about it. Even if these facts are rarer, the spiral of violence can go up to the parents between them.
My daughter was insulted and kicked by a student from her middle school. He was sanctioned, but his mother didn’t like it, who came to the establishment in person to insult and threaten my daughter with death, under the eyes of the supervisors and the CPE. I had myself been assaulted by this lady in front of the college. It was a municipal agent who had separated us at the time. I filed a complaint with the police. I was never called back.
the pHARE program, a government bullying prevention plan for schools and colleges, was rolled out across the country last September. Most of the time, bullying takes place in a group, the bullied being a scapegoat responsible for all the ills of the community. The group endorses by its silence, the violence being essentially psychological.
The most violent age group is undoubtedly the period of adolescence. Any change in behavior must be monitored, the harassed being no longer quite like the others. Parents but also the work of teachers at school are therefore important, especially on arrival at primary school.
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